Monday 26 February 2007

Meals on wheels

I am now ready to tell you about last week's trauma. Don't worry -- I didn't lose a limb or get squashed by a car or anything . . . nothing so bloody. But I did get abandoned for 36 hours, with the only contact being meals on wheels.

Ellen has done this before -- gone away on a work trip overnight, leaving me alone in the house -- and I hate it! It's bad enough that she leaves me home all day, without my having lonely evenings as well. And although she does warn me that she's not coming home, I never quite believe it.

Every evening I listen out for her to come home from work, and I'm there to welcome her! So I always get a shock when someone else opens the door instead. The first time it was her parents. I think her mum's afraid of me. I'm sure she doesn't like me. We rub each other up the wrong way. (And she always smells like that rotten dog, Jeddah.) I stay with Ellen's parents from time to time and they let me do what I want, which is nice. (Last time, they left a window open the whole time so I could go out all night!)

Then they went away, closed my cat door and left me to my own devices. Boring! A whole evening with nothing to do (except chase moths).

In the morning, Lita came to feed me. Lita is a cat person -- I can tell. She talks to me as an equal. I like that. She also lives with cats -- I can smell them. I wonder if they'd be nicer than those rotten furballs that live in my driveway? Anyone would be better than them. I try to be nice to Lita, but I think she's a bit wary of me as well. I must have swiped at her in the past. Maybe even drew blood. I was friendly to her this time though. I want her to like me again.

When Lita left, at least she opened my door again, so I could go outside. Ellen came home that night -- thanks to the great fluffball in the sky! She looked really tired and did nothing but watch TV for ages, but at least she let me sleep on her lap :-)

Monday 19 February 2007

Another fluffball almost hits the dust

There's this white fluffball feline that lives halfway down the driveway (on the other side of Oscar's house). I often watch her lounge about in the driveway, paying total disregard to whose garden she's in. She acts as if she OWNS the place (I think it's a she).

Anyway, this morning, Ellen almost ran her over in the car! I was watching from inside, and that stupid animal actually sauntered across in front of the car, so that Ellen actually had to stop for it!

I tried using ESP to get Ellen to run her over - it would have served her right - but it didn't work. Damn and bother!

At least she's never ventured into MY garden.

Sunday 18 February 2007

Cat and mouse

I finally found out why a computer mouse is called a mouse. (Although, it's more the size of a rat, really.) Anyway, you can play with it much as you do a mouse - it even has a long tail. The weird thing is that it even produces squeaking . . . although the squeaking comes mainly from Ellen as she tries to bat me away. Something about changing things on her computer?

Geez, you'd think she'd let me have some fun. She sits there, hour after hour, staring at the computer screen - caressing that damn mouse - you'd think she'd at least let me have fun with it too!

If she spoils my fun too much, I just chew on her wrist.

Tuesday 13 February 2007

Squashed kitty . . .

. . . well, almost.

It's all Ellen's fault for balancing a suitcase on a stack of junk (in fact, other suitcases) in her spare wardrobe. She should KNOW that I often go in there to play/sleep/hide and that it's dangerous having a case that could fall on top of me. I could have been killed.

Luckily I heard it shift and I ran away before it fell. But, gee, it was a close call! She would be very sorry if it squashed me.

Wednesday 7 February 2007

Bowled over by breakfast

A few weeks ago, Ellen starting eating cereal for breakfast. Now, every morning, she sits down at the table to eat. Naturally, I jump up on the table (to keep her company).

I'm sure it must be written down somewhere that all cats like special K. It's a given. So I cannot understand why Ellen doesn't let me have special K for breakfast too. Worse, she makes me eat on the floor (and don't get me started on those monstrous anti-hairball pellets she's got me on at the moment -- just because they were FREE).

Don't you think it would make more sense if we shared a bowl for breakfast? Less washing up, course. And such a companionable activity. She must know that I'd much rather a bowl of special K and milk. So tasty. But she won't let me near it. None of my tricksy head smooching manoeuvres will work. Every so often I get just close enough to inhale, and then she's batted my head away again.

It's just NOT FAIR!!

Tuesday 6 February 2007

Stalking huntsman

Ellen says I have to write something here, but I really can't be bothered. It's not like the past few days have been eventful or anything. A couple of really hot days, during which I slept under my favourite hydrangea bush; and then it turned colder, which gave me more energy to patrol MY GARDEN and keep that pesky Oscar out. I keep seeing her more and more! She thinks she's so cute with her grey fluffy coat. And I know she goes out of way to be nice to people, just to spite me. I hate her.

Tonight we have a huntsman on the wall up high. I am waiting for it to come down so I can pounce upon it.

Thursday 1 February 2007

Day from hell

There is simply no other way to describe it, but the day from hell. First, Jeddah was around ALL DAY. He was there when I woke up, there when I woke up again; in fact, he was there the third, fourth, fifth and sixth times I woke up.

I couldn't even get outside, so I had to use my litter tray for the first time in over 6 months. Now Ellen will have to clean it.

All day Jeddah ran about outside in MY GARDEN, taking up MY SPACE.

To cap it all off, Ellen had people around this evening. TEN of them! More invasion of my space. That stupid dog, Jeddah, barked at every second person who arrived. What's with that? Every second person?

Finally he got taken away, but the other invaders were still there so I escaped over the back fence. At least I got to stay out until much later than normal. Ellen's a lot more lenient when she has people over. I'm stuck inside now, though. But at least Jeddah and everyone else is finally GONE and I can have my house back to myself.