Behaving badly at the vet

It was just getting to the point when I was sure E had forgotten about my annual vet appointment. Somewhat remarkably for me, I hadn't been subjected to the trauma in over a year, and I was quite happy to keep it that way. But no, she had to remember.

She put me in a bad mood to start with because she didn't feed me as soon as she got home. She oughta know that I require sustenance the moment she arrives. It's been all day, and I'm starving. After all, she doesn't go all day without eating.

So then she stuffs me into the cage and I know something's up. She doesn't have a suitcase, so I know we're not going to the island (thanks to the cat gods). So where then? Oh $#*&, the VET!

First up there's a stupid teeny weeny pug-faced dog yapping at me in the waiting room. That didn't help my mood. It made me grumpy and irritable.

Oh all right, it made me foul. I was absolutely the devilcat from hell.

But no self-respecting feline should ever put up with being prodded and poked and having a light shone in your eyes and jabbed with a big needle and weighed -- how humiliating!

So I growled and I hissed and I scratched and I spat and I growled and I hissed and I scratched and I spat and I . . .

Dr C will probably never talk to me again.

As punishment, she has recommended E take me to an eye specialist AND go on a diet.

#$*&%!!!

There is nothing wrong with my eyes, thank you very much, I can see perfectly well. So what if one of them has changed colour? It still works. (Seems Dr C thinks I should have something called a bilateral retinal exam.) The strange thing is that it seems to have little to do with the colour-change.

And as for the diet . . . well all I can say is that E has tried that before . . . she keeps threatening me with a diet, but never follows through. She's shown she's extremely susceptible to my 'pleading' when it comes to food.

I've got her wound around my little finger.

Bet I can make her forget about the eye doctor. Whoever heard of an animal opthamologist anyway?

PS: For once no urinary issues -- woo hoo!

In disgrace

We had children in the house today and I'm afraid I lost my cool. When there was only one, I could deal with it, even for a whole weekend. But I'm afraid three were too many.

The thing is they are so fascinated with me! Here am I, trying to sleep peacefully, when the children come and fling themselves towards me. I growl and hiss a bit, to make them keep away, and it seems to work. (I made one of them cry just by growling, though, which didn't make me feel very good.)

But then one came just that bit too close and I swiped. I tried to stop, truly I did, but my claw was swinging before I realised. And then Ellen started yelling at me and trying to get me off my cushion to make me go outside, and so I attacked her. Drew blood and everything. Oh dear.

The one I swiped at screamed loud enough to send the driveway cats scampering, but she seemed to calm down eventually. I don't suppose she'll be back for a holiday though. As for Ellen, well she gave me such dirty looks that it's a miracle I got fed this evening. I am well and truly in disgrace.

Five days

Geez, she left me for five whole days this time. Not nice.

I did get some fleeting visits from a few people, but that was all. They breezed in (I hid under the bed) and pretended all was normal and fine, and then they breezed out again. I think they opened my door some of the time, but I was never game to try it out, in case they didn't let me back in again. So I spent a whole five days INSIDE!

And that stupid feeding contraption is so unreliable! Thanks goodness I had visitors who seemed to go out of their way to provide me with food, because there were no guarantees otherwise. Seeing the food, but not being able to get it, would have been worse than ANY diet!

As a result I was on my BEST behaviour when the visitors came (which is why I hid under the bed).

I note that now Ellen is home, she's removed the feeding contraption, so I suppose the diet will resume again. She tells me that one of the reasons my food kept running out was because I ate too much. Hmmph.

PS As punishment for being left alone for five whole days, I declined to use my litter tray once and went on the floor in Ellen's study. It was so funny watching her crawl around the room sniffing, trying to work out where it was! She found it eventually, and she didn't even tell me off! I think she's feeling guilty.

PPS Ellen has assured me this is the last time for a long time that she'll leave me home alone. I sure hope so!

Chenna before keyboard

I long ago worked out that if I sit on top of Ellen's keyboard, she can't do anything about it. It makes her do one of two things:

> she either shoves the keyboard away under her computer (there's a drawer) and allows me to smooch her;

> or she sits back and allows me to sit on her lap while she tries to type.

Either way, I can chew on her wrist. This evening, I sit on her lap as she types this, chewing her wrist. It's a sign of love and endearment, don't you know?

Jeckle and Hyde

I don't know what's wrong with me. Just gave Ellen a big cuddle, then sunk my teeth into her wrist. I couldn't help it!

Maybe I really do need therapy.

An apology

I was very ungracious yesterday. Ellen's little niece Hannah came to visit, bringing me toys she'd made herself out of coloured pipecleaners. They were beautiful, and I couldn't help watching as she rolled them across the floor. But I was sleeping and sulking, fed up with the rain that was keeping me indoors and out of my garden. So I didn't get up to play with them.

Hannah is really rather adorable, and she always comes to say hello to me. But I just don't know how to act with other people! They always want to stroke me and touch me and talk to me. Usually, I just want them to leave me alone.

I lashed out at Hannah when she came to say goodbye. I wish I hadn't done that. Now she'll really be scared of me. I'm glad I didn't actually get her. She looked very sombre. Do you think she'll still be my friend?

Bloodquest

This evening I attacked Ellen and drew blood. Mainly on her hands, but some on her ankles as well.

She cried.

She's such a sook.