Caught on film

It's really getting a bit ridiculous. I could be forgiven for thinking Ellen doesn't live here any more. Last weekend she was away for four days straight, and then she went away again this weekend. She's home now, but I'm not talking to her.

Last weekend, she was away so long that Sal and Dave from unit 7 came by to feed me. Although Ellen had warned me they were coming, they took me a bit by surprise, because they brought in a video camera and filmed me! For most of the time I was on my best behaviour . . . but then I'm afraid I forgot and . . . well, let's just say I drew blood. Oops. And now there's proof. Maybe I'll post it as a 'how to be a devilcat' video!

Best weekend ever!

What a great couple of days! The only slight hiccup in my weekend of freedom came this evening when I chucked up my dinner in my bowl, so I had to wait for E to come home and feed me again. (Because, unlike some felines, I do NOT like to eat regurgitated foodstuffs if I can avoid it.)

But, otherwise, I had a fantastic time! There was the inevitable altercation with the evil ginger cat, plus I had some fun chuckling at White Fluffball, who's had his ears cut off. (I shouldn't laugh, I really shouldn't, particularly when I'm in danger of having my eye cut out! All we need is for Zimmy to lose his tongue and the driveway cats will resemble the three wise monkeys . . .) Anyway, I'd rather lose my ears than my eye . . . But I digress . . .

Home alone . . . no rules or regulations, no curfew . . . no noise to wake me up from snoozing. It really is a great life.

Now E's home though, I do rather like snuggling up and getting cuddles. It's the best of both worlds!

Pathetic (reputation shattered)

Ellen is home.

For three weeks I've been planning and plotting how I'm going to punish her, so that when she got home she would vow and declare never to do it again. (So, I'll admit it. Being home alone isn't all it's cracked up to be. A weekend is fine. No worries. But three weeks? That's just cruel and BORING.)

Many things passed through my mind (some of which Beth has alluded to in her previous post). But how to make it really good? A punishment worthy of the period of time? After all, I've been known to leave deposits after a mere weekend! Surely three weeks deserves something more. Bigger. Grander. More of a statement! (And bodily fluids are so passe!)

So I had it all worked out. I was going to hide. Hide, so that she thought I'd run away. I was going to stay away all day, make her feel really bad. (As well as all the bodily fluid deposits of course.)

But in this I have failed dismally. I took one look at her this morning and disintegrated into a blubbering mess. I meowed and cried and sooked, and followed her around the house, completely unbelieving she was finally home and fearful she would disappear again.

I am so PATHETIC. I still cannot allow her to leave my sight. The mere thought makes me quake.

I didn't even leave her ANY deposits. I clean forgot.

So much for my devilcat reputation!

Tricksy

So. She really did it. Went away and left me. It's after midnight on Friday and it's been nearly a week. All on my own.

I've been very good. Haven't left any deposits on the floor. I've even sussed out my cat door and I can roam free all night and all day (when I'm not sleeping on my cushion).

Thelma from next door is feeding me -- hasn't forgotten once! I've decided I'm going to try not to hiss at her, because if I keep hissing she might stop feeding me, and that would be BAD. So I'm TRYING to be on my best behaviour.

But every so often I play a little trick on her. Sometimes I see her coming and I bolt out of my cushion and hide somewhere in the house - or outside - just so I can watch her crawl around the house looking for me (he he he).

But I'm trying to be on my best behaviour.

3 weeks

I don't believe it. Ellen has gone away for THREE WEEKS and left me home all alone. I simply can't believe it.

I thought a week was bad enough. How am I supposed to last three?

She's installed a new cat flap that has a magnetic clasp, so now I have to push my through the door. It took me a couple of days to figure it out -- I thought it was locked when it wasn't!

And she has all her new neighbour-buddies coming in to feed me twice a day. I never get a moment's peace!

Hmph. You'll be hearing more from me soon!

More bad behaviour

Things are not all well at home. Ellen is going away soon and she's leaving me home all alone for three weeks! The neighbours will be around to keep me company, but it won't be the same. I hope she gets my catdoor fixed first! The new one hasn't been fitted yet.

Anyway, as a precaution she made me go to the vet yesterday. HATE the vet. I let her know it too. I did NOT behave very well. A true devilcat. He he he.

So I had my vaccinations. And then I was weighed.

Not good. It looks like I'm going to have to go on a diet again! The last one I went on (last year) didn't work, and it turns out that Ellen bought the wrong food. So she put me though the torture all for nothing. So now when she's back from her trip I'll have to go back on the diet food.

Not happy!

Off my food

Thank the cat gods that's over. Three days locked inside, all alone. Forced to use litter trays. Simply awful.

At least there were three litter trays to chose from, although I only needed one. I found I lost my appetite through the whole ordeal actually. At first I kept coughing up hairballs and then I couldn't keep any food down. So there was quite a lot of food left over.

But I survived. And aside from leaving piles of half-digested food for Ellen to clean up, I didn't make any mess at all.

But I do hope my cat door gets fixed soon!

Prisoner (complete overreaction)

I should have guessed that Ellen would completely overreact and start locking me inside every day now. Basically, unless she's home, she locks my cat door so I can't get out.

And last night, when I finally managed to get outside, she locked me out all evening! She's certainly never done that before. So there I was, forced to stay outside until she got home at almost midnight!

And NOW she tells me she's going to the island for a few days, leaving me locked inside the whole time! She's putting additional litter trays down, and the auto-flying-saucer-feeder, and then I'm stuck here with my own company until Saturday night!

I can't wait until she gets my flap fixed and the magnet works again. That will hopefully mean she'll allow the door to stay open when she goes away, because the evil demon ginger cat will be unable to get inside.

I confess I would probably rather go with her to the island, even with that pesky Jeddah dog there, than stay at home locked inside on my own. (sob)

(And now, to make matters worse, that evil ginger cat is once more trying to get inside my door! That'll just convince Ellen that she's right. Sheesh!!)

Unappreciated present

Ah well, it was great while it lasted. Had a fab few days here on my own, but Ellen came home this afternoon and now I have to share the house with her again.

While she was gone, I could go anywhere I wanted, in and out of the house.

Just so she'd appreciate me, I left her a little present in her study. After all, she spends so much time in there . . .

I was up on the edge of her desk -- just wishing she were here for a bit of extra food, lounging beside her keyboard -- and I needed to, well, you know, GO.

So I popped my rear over the edge of the desk and went!

It's becoming a favourite game of mine to watch Ellen sniff her way around the house when she gets home, looking for my present . . . She creeps around on her hands and knees, sniff sniff sniffing . . . And then with a yelp she finds it!

It's all cleaned up now. I don't think she liked my present much, actually.

More alone time

A ha! Another five days of alone time. I'm gonna roam outside all night, get into fights, raid the pantry, pee all over the floor, catch rodents and leave them on the rug . . .

Sigh. Bliss.

A week of freedom

Well I never expected to be left home alone for an entire WEEK! That's what it was in the end. A whole week! Ellen never would have done that before I was five.

The talking food contraption whirred and spat out my food. The first few times I thought Ellen had come home because it played a stupid little message from her. It didn't take long however for me to have it sussed. Humans really do underestimate our intelligence.

The only living human I saw in all that time (aside from neighbours pottering about in the driveway) was Sarah, who came to refill the whirring food contraption a few times. Other than that, no-one. Nothing.

My feline flap was left open for the entire time so I roamed at large when and where I wanted. So aside from the fact that Ellen turned the heating off and the house was freezing, I was quite comfortable. And when it got too cold, I just crawled under the doona.

She came home yesterday and lounged about on the sofa all day while I slept on my cushion. The first thing she did was feed me. The second thing she did was put on the heating! It was very companionable.

Even though I am more than capable of looking after myself (so long as I am fed), it is nice to have her home.

so long as I get fed

Home alone again. This is the second night -- at least, E isn't home yet and she didn't come home last night and it's pretty late . . .

Now I know what the flying saucer thing was for -- the one that talks. Every morning and evening it whirrs and talks and rotates around until food is revealed. Sarah came around tonight and refilled it, so I can only assume E isn't coming home for another day or so . . .

Bored. But at least I can play outside. And so long as I get fed, I suppose it's not so bad.

A bad feeling . . .

I have a bad feeling . . . E is up to something. She's getting home from work later and later . . . sometimes I wonder whether she actually lives here!

After leaving me home alone for a night last weekend, I thought she'd have made more of an effort to be around this week.

Even more intriguing, she's spent the last hour or so playing around with a contraption that looks a bit like a flying saucer. It whirs and gyrates and 'talks' to me (in Ellen's voice). And now she's put it down where my food bowl is supposed to go . . .

I have a very bad feeling about this!

Obesity management -- not!

Things are definitely afoot at the moment, and not in a good way. I've just found out that Dr C and E are colluding on my diet.

It seems that E is actually feeding me not-very-much-at-all (I could have told you that!) so the actual amount that I'm to eat isn't to be reduced at all (thanks to the cat gods). Instead, in order to lose weight (~1/2 kg), I've apparently got to have "royal canin obesity management" food mixed in with my urinary food.

What the --? OBESITY? I am NOT obese!

This is all Ellen's fault. She was the one who asked Dr C if she thought I was fat. And Ellen is the one who has clearly not been encouraging me to do enough exercise. It's her responsibility, not mine.

All this, and I've just been stuck at home alone for 24 hours as well. My life absolutely sucks.

In search of love and attention

Thanks be to the catgods, but this week is finally over. Although I rather enjoy my own company, enough is enough. Ellen was hardly home at all this week, and I've been so BORED. After a whole 4-day weekend with no company, she might have spent some time with me in the days following, but no! Late home every evening . . . and not until 2am on Thursday -- or should I say Friday morning? And that was how long she was at WORK!

Now the week is over, she will hopefully give me some love and attention. I deserve no less. Food and smoochies are in great order. And I intend to sit on her lap . . . LOTS.

It was good while it lasted

So Ellen comes home again and the first thing she does is lock me inside during the night. How come it's OK when she's not here, but not OK all the other times?

After two weekends of freedom in a row, I was starting to get used to it.

She put all the food away too, so now I have to wait until she feeds me, or pester her until she relents. It would be so much easier if she just put all the food in a bowl and let me decide when I'm hungry. How should she know how much food I need to eat?

On patrol, intruders beware!

Just dashed in for a spot of blogging, and then I'll be back outside. Oh what fun! The stars are really bright tonight as I bask on the rooftop. Nothing to keep me inside. I really think I could live like this all the time. Why does Ellen lock me inside anyway? With me patrolling outside, that ginger intruder, Zim Zam, wouldn't be able to come near my deck or my garden. It's a different matter with me outside, defending my property, rather than stuck inside. I'd like to see him come anywhere NEAR me!

If only life could be like this when Ellen is here as well. There's nothing wrong with me being outside at night. Nothing at all. It's BRILLIANT!

sleep on the stomach

Damn and bother, I can't seem to get near Ellen's lap this evening. She's got her computer on her lap, so I have to make do with her stomach. I guess it's lucky that she's more or less stretched out!

I've had a nice day today, and I've just learnt that Ellen's going away yet again this weekend, so I'll be home alone again. It seems someone will come to make sure I have food. Probably her mum this time. We don't get along so well. I don't think she likes me too much.

Ellen's lap is actually quite comfortable. I don't suppose she'd be too happy to hear me say so!

Deviousness

Finally the mouse spirits decided to leave me alone, thanks be to the catgods. But that stupid human, Ellen, thought it might have had something to do with my bell, so she took it off. As if I would be scared of a pesky bell!

Nevertheless, I decided that no bell was a good thing, so when she put it on me again the other day, just to see whether it was the bell that had me hiding under the couch, I waited until I saw coming home up the driveway, and then I hid under her bed! This meant that she thought I'd been hiding all day, so she took the bell off again!

Man, I rock.

I'm in a pretty good mood today, because I've just had another whole weekend home alone. E went to the island without me again. I must say I rather like this gig with the cat door hole so I can come and go all day and all night exactly as I please.

Exhausted

Ellen's home and the fun is over. What an amazing weekend! I confess I'm now rather exhausted after galavanting around for three days and nights.